Draco and the Pygmy Puffs
by Darksnickle-PrincessKezadoodle
Summary: Draco appears in a talent show with his dancing posse, The Pygmy Puffs. A little surprise for Harry he he. HPDM


**Disclaimer:** NoI do not own HP or any of the characters mentioned in this story, but i do however admit to owning the laptop whichI wrote this on. AlsoI do not own the 'Shoop shoop song' by Cher.

**Pairings:** Harry/Draco, Ron/Pansy, Theo/Hermione, Blaise/Ernie, Dean/Seamus, Ginny/Luna.

**A.N. **I didn't mean to, but just as a warning Draco is drastically over the top. Oh yeah and thankyou to my best Andy who let me use his word 'smexy'. Enjoy! Oh yeah, The italicsare Draco singing and the bold is Pansy and Hermione singing.

**Draco and the Pygmy Puffs.**

It was St.Patrick's day and to the astonishment of the students of Hogwarts, earlier this morning Dumbledore had made a big announcement about his Irish heritage. And seeing how it was St.Patrick's day, he thought it was the perfect excuse to have a talent show. After the news about the talent show, there had been a rush of students eagerly wanting to sign up but there were some who didn't want to be in the limelight:

Harry, Ron, Theo, Blaise, Dean and Ginny (coughLESBIANcough) were all sitting together in the great hall, front row seats waiting for the show to start. Ever since the gryffindors had started dating the slytherins the guys had found out that they made a brilliant posse! Although some weren't dating people from the oppoisite houses they didn't care, cos like hello? Harry and Draco together were hot together and everyone agreed on this.

Suddenly, bright and lights and music, like the kind you'd see in a broadway show blasted out of somewhere behind the curtains. A troup of acrobats following Dumbledore round the stage because he was the host.

"HELLOOO and wellcome to the foirst ever St.Paddy's Day taylent shoow!" Dumbles said in his newly found anoyingly over-enthusasitic irish accent. Students had placed a bet on where he had found it, the winning bet was that he had bought it off wizarding Ebay.

"And too start thee shooow we have a woooonderfull new act, singing the Shoop Shoop song. Please make a great welcome for ... OH NO! MY VOICE HAS BROKEN DAMN! No! thats not the act!... (insert conviently placed drum role here) Draco and the Pygmy Puffs!" There was a slight round of applause, but no-one could really find the energy to cheer. They were afterall hormonal teenagers.

"Oh Lord not this song. Anything but this song!" Harry desperately cried out to no-one in particular.

"Mate how bad can it get?" Ron tried to reassurre his best mate.

All of a sudden, as soon as Dumbledore had left the stage, there was a blackout. A few screams were heard but hey,the curtains were opened and then a spot light was shone onto the center of the stage. The music to the Shoop Shoop started and out tapdanced Draco and his group, the Pygmy Puffs. Once they reached the center, on closer inspection the audience could see Hermione, Pansy, Ernie, Seamus and Luna all wearing lime green silk boiler suits. And in the middle, in between Pansy and Hermione stood Draco who was sporting a 'Cher' wig atop his head and was covered in an array of fantastical stage colours. He was wearing a costume consisting of a hot pink fake snake leather jacket that he had purchases from Barnados and a turquoise and crimson coloured Bucks Fizz stylee skirt.

(Going back to Harry and posse...)

"I am so not letting him keep that jacket. I don't care what he says but there is no way that I will let him wear it around me." Harry told everyone.

"What not even if he wants to keep it to use in the bedroom Harry?" Harry just stared at Theo speechless and he was about to reply when there was a sudden hush of noise.

Pansy handed Draco a microphone and he started to sing:

_"Does he love me, I wanna know,_

_How can I tell if he loves me so?"_

Ernie, Seamus and Luna all started doing the Conga around Draco, Pansy, and Hermione. The girls leaned in and sung:

**"Is it in his eyes?"**

_"Oh, no you'll be deceived"_

"This...ha.. has gotta... be the... best thing I...have ever seen ha ha" Ron choked out through his laughter, his face now a bright red, bet he didn't care this was act was indescribable!

Thanks alot for the support ron!" Harry almost shouted out, blushing furiously, it was obvious who Draco was singing this song about...

**"Is it in his sighs?"**

_"Oh, no he'll make believe_

_If you wanna know"_

Pansy and Hermione start to skip around him...meanwhile in the background Luna had done a spectacular flashdance jump twirling around in the air for a few seconds.

Ginny, who was clad in denim dunagarees and had a pipe hanging out of her pocket, stood up on her chair and wolf-whistled at her girlfriend. Luna knew not to do that in public, the foxy slut, she knew how much it turned Ginny on!

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"If he loves you so"_

**Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"It's in his kiss"_

**"That's where it is, oh yeah"**

Back in the front row, everybody was laughing at Harry, who was trying to achieve the impossible task of fitting himself under his chair, but who was failing miserably. The guys and girl, heard a muffled "Gee thanks guys" coming from under Harry's seat.

**"Or is it in his face?"**

_"Oh no, i'ts just his charms"_

**"In his warm embrace?"**

_"Oh no, that's just his arms_

_if you wanna know"_

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"If he loves you so"_

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"It's in his kiss"_

**"That's where it is"**

_"Oh, it's in his kiss"_

Draco then started twirling around the stage, all the Pygmy Puffs following him to a door that had just magically appeared out of nowhere. Turning his attention to the audience, Draco called out...

"Should I open the door?"

"Yes!" everyone shouted out apart from a strangely familar voice that Draco could have sworn shouted out "NO!"

Draco opened the door and out danced 6 scantily dressed Harry lookalikes.

The guys were now falling out of their chairs laughing, this was just too much for them!

"Oi Harry! I think you should really check this out mate! Dean shouted out over all the laughter.

Harry grudgingly left his safe haven from under his chair and looked up at the stage. What he saw was Draco now being lifted up by six scantily dressed versions of him, who he thought must have taken the polyjuice potion to look that much like him.

"WHAT IN BLAZES HELL IS HE PLAYING AT?" He screamed!

"Harry, ha ha, calm dude! It's hilarious" Ron told him, although he had by now given up trying to stop his laughter.

"Priceless" Laughed Theo.

"Whoa, hug him and squeeze him tight

Find out what you wanna know

If it's love, if it really is

It's there in his kiss"

Draco then proceded to have a group hug with all the 'Harrys' and Seamus pinched one of their arses. Alot of wolf whistles were heard when Ernie started making out heavily with one of them.

"OMG THEY'RE SPOSED TO BE ME! WHAT ARE THEY DOING? DRACO! GET YOUR HANDS OFF THEM NOW!" Unfortunately for poor little Harry, Draco couldn't hear his shouts of protests over all the shouts, whistles, cheers and singing, he was having too much fun dancing with the Harry lookalikes after all!

"HA HA! HARRY YOUR FACE!"

"Shut it Ginny! I'm sure Luna likes having an alive girlfriend!"

"Oh you wouldn't hurt a girl Harry!"

Meanwhile on stage...

**"How 'bout the way he acts?"**

_Oh no, that's not the way_

_Your'e not listenin' to all I said_

_If you wanna know"_

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

Pansy and Mione got down on their knees and begged Draco, who glanced around and saw Ernie, Luna, and Seamus chasing the Harry lookalikes around the stage and who actually seemed quite scared.

_"If he loves you so"_

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"It's in his kiss"_

**"That's where it is"**

_"Oh, its in his kiss"_

_**"That's where it is"**_

Then it was made clear why Draco was wearing a skirt, in a glorious dramatic spin, he ripped his skirt off like he was someone from Bucks Fizz, (in fact he was so good that if he had been born at the time, he probably could have auditioned for them) revealing an emerald green corset and black suspenders and tights with a silver garter. His Jacket went flying into the air, so that someone could from the audience could catch it. 'Mione and Pansy then dragged in another Harry look alike who was on a dog leash and passed the chain to Draco who then made him bow down and started skipping merrily around the poor traumatised guy.

"OH MERLIN WHAT IS HE WEARING! HE KNOW'S HOW MUCH IT TURNS ME ON WHEN I SEE HIM IN A CORSET! AND THAT FAKE 'ME', IF HE DOES ANYTHING WITH HIM THEN I SWEAR HE WON'T LIVE TO SEE ANOTHER PADDY'S DAY!"

"Harry calm down, Draco's just having some fun! Look how happy he is! And anyway you know he adores you." Blaise tried reasoning. Then in a bright glimpse of hot pink, the jacket was seen spotted flying overhead, and Harry with the Bamdastic seeker skills that he possessed, jumped up and caught the jacket, with an odd gleam in his eyes.

"Mineeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" he hissed, everyone started backing away from him really slowly scared by the slightly pyschotic expression on their friend's face.

_"Whoa,hug him and squeeze him tight_

_Find what you wana know_

_If it's love, if it really is_

_It's there in his kiss"_

Behind Draco, Pansy and 'Mione, the other three start doing a fairy dance in their newly acquired tutus and were foolisly waving their wands about, making baby pink fairy wings appear on the back of Draco, levitating him and swinging him about to give the illusion that he was flying.

**"How 'bout the way he acts?"**

_"Oh no, that's not the way_

_You're not listenin' to all I said_

_If you wanna know"_

_**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**_

_"If he loves you so"_

**"Shoop, shoop, shoop, shoop"**

_"It's in his kiss"_

**"That's where it is"**

"Somebody get Draco down right now! He could fall or anything!" Harry was this time ignored so he in a very over the top and huffily way, huffed and sat down on his chair, trying to make a big scene but it was no use as everyone was watching Draco 'fly' around the great hall.

_"Oh, it's in his kiss"_

**"That's where it is"**

_"Oh, yeah it's in his kiss"_

**"It's in his kiss**

**That's where it is"**

_"Ooh, it's in his kiss"_

**"It's in his kiss"**

_"That's where it is"_

Draco gracefully landed on his feet and pranced over to Pansy and 'Mione who were now dressed in electirc blue bridesmaid dresses and Hermione swished her wand so that Draco was now wearing a bright white wedding dress and veil, green and silver eyeshadow gracing his eyes and bright red lipstick painted thickly over his lips, giving him a virginal look. Luna, Ernie and Seamus were all dressed in tuxes, and were setting up the stage for the final finale.

_A huge twinkly, sparkly noise was heard and then in the background of the stage, a huge magical picture of Harry and Draco kissing was pasted up on the wall and in the photo things seemed to be getting pretty steamy._

_"Its in his kiss_

_That's where it is_

_Ooh, it's in his kiss_

_That's where it is_

_Ooh, oh it's in his kiss_

_Ooh, oh it's in his kiss_

_That's where it is"_

With the final words, everyone on the stage made a circle around Draco bowing down to him, who was kneeling on one knee, like he was about to be knighted and was waving his hands around. Then Suddenly, a huge bang was heard and thousands of fireworks were let off writing 'Harry & Draco 4eva' in the sky. A huge cheering and round of applause went up for them and Dumbles who never paid any attention to the rules, apparated on to the stage, well he tried and missed, accidently squashing a first year in the process.

"Please give a huge round of applause to Draco and the Pygmy Puffs!" Again a huge round of applause circled the great hall and a spotlight lit up on everyone on the stage.

_"Thankyou! Thankyou everyone! OMG I think i'm going to cry!" Draco said to everyone._

_Draco and all his 'Pygmy Puff's walked off the stage but there was someone there, waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs..._

_"Harry! Did you like the performance? It was all about you!"_

_"Yes, I know it was, but did you really know have to wear that corset? You know what it does to me when you wear one!"_

_"Yes love it was part of the effect"_

_"Come on, we're going"_

_"Where? Oh and Harry can I have my jacket back?"_

_Harry smirked an evily smexy, horny smirk at Draco. "Only if you can beat me to the bedroom" And he set off running at full speed, knowing that Draco would never be able to catch up with him in THAT dress._

_"Haaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy that's not faaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!" _

Needless to say, Draco and the Pygmy Puffs won the first ever St.Patrick's day talent show, and the next morning they were presented with a huge trophy that only Hagrid was able to pick up.

**A.N. **OMG, I know that was extremely over the top but hey wasn't it fun? Hope I didn't offend anyone cos I love Harry and Draco together, they just make such a cute couple.


End file.
